The 10 Fastest Production Cars In The World.

So you’re crazy for fancy-nancy Euro cars, eh? They’re loud, they’re flashy, they cost way too much. They’re forever young, hip, and exclusive. They’re sports cars, but not just any sports cars. These are the world’s fastest and, err, most furious production cars. You can’t afford them. Even if you could, your social connections aren’t firm enough.

But you can dream. And these mean machines are the stuff of dreams. From the days of Henry Ford with his legendary Model T, to the fictional escapades of Doc Brown and his illustrious DeLorean, the dream of man has been to build a machine that would go faster, quicker, and further than anything before it. The cars on this list accomplish something of that noble goal, although the future – as always – promises even better and more.

Without further ado, here is a comprehensive list of the world’s ten finest – and fastest- production cars. Read and weep.

10. Ferrari LaFerrari


Our list begins with the Ferrari LaFerrari. Yes, they actually named it that. Continentals are so annoying with their pretentious twaddle, all bleu cheese and operatic wailing, but it must be admitted that they certainly know how to make a very fast sports car. The Ferrari LaFerrari (roll the “rrrrr’s” for maximum irritation) tops out at a very respectable 217 mph.

9. Lamborghini Veneno


Not only can you not afford the Lamborghini Veneno, but you’ll most likely never ever see one in the flesh. In a display of ultra-pretentious exclusivity clear designed to rankle the socks of their unwillingly out-snobbed Ferrari colleagues, the bright young things at the Lamborghini board room have deigned to release only three of these. A maximum potential of 740 horsepower and a top speed of 221 mph are the statistics we have for this rarest of birds.

8. Noble M600


England’s entry into the ultra-exclusive fast car sweepstakes is a strong one. The M600 tops out at a chipper 225 mph, enabling you to say cheerio to the Big Smoke at a clip even Mr. Toad would envy. There’s been a lot of self-congratulatory ego stroking concerning the fact that the car weighs astonishingly little (just over 2,600 Olde English pounds). It’s also packed with twin turbochargers (whoosh!) that raise its total output of horsepower to a sweet 650. Sweet sporting, old bean, and a jolly good show!

7. Gumpert Apollo


The Gumpert Apollo is the wunderkind of precise German engineering. Its top speed is 225 mph, with a horsepower output of 640 pounds. Like its British cousin, the M600, it tops out at just over 2,600 pounds. The Apollo is a work of beauty. It is sleek, it is noble, it is the product of obvious technical superiority and, to be fully appreciated, must have Lebensraum. In fact, plans are underway to annex the Sudetenland as a parking garage for this magnificent machine.

6. Pagani Huayra


The world renowned (we never heard of them, either) Italian auto maker, Pagani, has done it, err, again with their latest super model, the Huayra (rolls off the tongue like a lead balloon, doesn’t it?). The Huayra has a top speed of 231 mph, with a maximum horsepower output of 720. It’s certainly sleek and futuristic looking enough to insure maximum non-affordability, but its somewhat ungainly weight of 3,000 pounds might be enough to make even the stuffiest Italo-phile think twice. Let’s face it, Tony Soprano didn’t drive no Huayra.